Had I Known Before !

Disclaimer: This Article is gonna be nothing like before ! Because after the last article I sought suggestions of people from quite different perspectives and I would like to see through it that their advises are put to good use. 
And as a challenge I would like to implement all 4 of those people's advises in this article itself!
Although it is long, nevertheless(pun intended, although not visible) Here it goes.

My life is worth the living only because I can use it to help out others who are lost; Lost somewhere or the other. Either running after money or running away from someone who they owe it to. Running to catch time, finding it slipping through their fingers yet again. Submerged in oceans of lust not knowing that that 'touch' cannot give them what they are looking for. Same is the case with the taste of the food on our tongues, with the motion pictures in front of our eyes, music that we listen to and fragrances that we smell. They cannot but dissapoint you in giving joy !

My life is worth the living because I can help out not only others but even myself, when I am lost.

Once upon a time in a very real world, I existed. Truly speaking - "I" + "existed". Just born the normal way, the future was planned and Death was an inevitable doom I had to suffer one day!
I too was caught in, "that if this then it would be" all over and I can finally relax, and put hard work to a definitive hold. I studied two years of my life in the hope that I will never have to study as much again if I got into a good college! - UNTRUE!

Let us cut the chase short

Initially.. I did use to do loads of disreputable acts - BAD BAD BAD ! 
y = (-c) + sin(t) ; |c| >> 1;

Art of Living happened!  in 12th standard for the first time, it was like catching a glimpse of the intermittent striking of the fluorescent tube after you switch it off. You can swear it is real, you know it is there but still there is a part of you that is still not sure.

DCE(DTU) happened - 5 seniors walk into class; AOL AOL AOL. I sign up for the program.
The game dynamics change; equations are replaced!
y = (t) + sin(t); 
On the rise since then!

So what is this stuff about Had I known before! 

You know it is one thing to do the AOL program. Do a couple of high level programs also. Get into volunteering activities. But it is totally "on an other planet" thingy to chose a Master in Life.

Or to put myself better and correctly it is totally on an other plant thingy that you have been chosen by a Master in this lifetime!

The realization is rather a subtle one there were moments when u were not sure if this is it; and now there are moments u think of him and tears well up in your eyes, the throat chokes, the heart opens up to give more and receive in amounts larger than what u could think for yourself.

Thinking to myself a while back that what could be worth doing in this lifetime (read : what this life could be worth), knowing the impermanence of it. The answer was to make the people I leave behind more happier than they already are. What else could it be more worth of. And there is only one person who I can without doubt attribute this to. And I am utterly grateful to him for taking charge of this life of mine.
Not one day passes by when I do not think if this change could have been brought in earlier. Well I know, that this was how it was meant to be and if it hadn't there might have been a post "Had I done this and that before AOL". 
I think what if there was no BAD BAD BAD; knowing that, if I had not gone through my fair share of debauchery, the talents I have got to offer would not have been there. Not questioning the course of events, the wonder still remains in my mind - What if ! I had known before !

Everything around is changing at the very moment. These principles, fundamentals, thought processes I am sharing about may and will change. May be even in an "ANTI - AOL" manner but what this man had made me experience in these past 2 years cannot be flouted by words, even if they are his own. 

So I am in; for a lifetime ! 

If you must know what the suggestions were
Mugdha Kabra asked me to not frame much, just flow with the writing because the first draft is the best one.
So as I promise to myself I did not edit the draft once.
Vaibhav Tripathi asked me to write more in the first person, which I hope I did.
Tripti Jangpangi suggested on keeping the topics fresh !
and Yatharth Verma commented something very subtle, which I too felt about my last post and i am gonna take him up on his advise. What he did tell me is something more of a compliment and I do not wish to brag.
I hope I did justice to these people!

With love and tears of joy
Manik
Jai Gurudeva !

Ted Mosby's Drumroll

Sometimes you get this inexplicable urge to express some emotion, laughter or a little sadness/nostalgia, maybe. Like when you are watching a movie, you know it is all pre-scripted, but your mind still reacts to the scenes. Either you completely control your emotions or you aren't able to control them at all. Either way you have lost the "greater joy" in it.

All I say is, become aware of it and then let it flow, that is the beauty of it, that is the enlightened within you experiencing the pleasure of the senses; of the mind.

Such great would be the flavour of that nectar, that you wouldn't be able to hold that infinity within your finiteness. It will ooze out of you, drive you to madness, pull you into nothingness; it will find 'you'.

There is so much ecstasy in awareness that it will make you cry. Awareness will lead you to that ecstasy. The ecstasy would be so pure, so intense it would feel like pain, but you would not want it to stop. You will loose control and plunge inwards. And as soon as you want to regain control, awareness again would be the magic spell. It will  establish you back in the centre. 

Try to recall How I Met Your Mother's Episode "Drumroll! Please"? Where in Ted meets Victoria. And the conversation that unfolds is

Victoria - The best part of any first kiss is the lead up to it. The moment right before the lips touch. It's like a big drum roll. So, how about, tonight we just stick with the drum roll? 

Ted - Okay.. 

Victoria - But we cannot kiss.. 

Ted - Okay (and Music begins)

 Voila ! 

Thesaurus.com straight away puts enlightened and wise as synonyms of being "aware".

Sri Sri says - "Aversions and desires come into your mind, then how much you flow with them or how much you hold back is your wisdom."

and that "how much" comes from your awareness !

So here I am expressing my experiences and diving in them again; becoming more aware. 

Because I know that awareness will make the journey more thrilling than achieving the goal itself; than the "The End".

Do you follow what I said ?

BECOME AWARE

Love & Awareness
Manik
Jai Gurudeva


P.S. If you are thinking - but aware about what? then I'd suggest you to go do the YES!++ course..